Gli psicologi di Harvard hanno studiato per 15 anni le interazioni tra le persone, e scritto anche un libro, per capire che quando una persona ne incontra un’altra la giudica in base a due criteri: 1 Posso credere a questa persona? 2 Posso rispettarla?
Mio nonno mi insegnava queste cose che facevano parte della sua cultura quotidiana. Poi la cultura moderna “americanizzante” ce le ha strappate e ora rientrano come scoperte scientifiche. Io allora farei un studio su queste prassi sociali bizzarre e divertenti, se non fosse che nel quotidiano finiamo per credere reali le loro conseguenze.
Harvard social psychologist Amy Cuddy.
People size you up in seconds, but what exactly are they evaluating?Harvard Business School professor Amy Cuddy has been studying first impressions alongside fellow psychologists Susan Fiske and Peter Glick for more than 15 years, and has discovered patterns in these interactions.In her new book, “Presence,” Cuddy says people quickly answer two questions when they first meet you:
- Can I trust this person?
- Can I respect this person?
Psychologists refer to these dimensions as warmth and competence respectively, and ideally you want to be perceived as having both.Interestingly, Cuddy says that most people, especially in a professional context, believe that competence is the more important factor. After all, they want to prove that they are smart and talented enough to handle your business.But in fact warmth, or trustworthiness, is the most important factor in how people evaluate you. “From an evolutionary perspective,” Cuddy says, “it is more crucial to our survival to know whether a person deserves our trust.” It makes sense when you consider that in cavemen days it was more important to figure out if your fellow man was going to kill you and steal all your possessions than if he was competent enough to build a good fire.